Alright so hello everyone to my first post on my personal blog. I was going to make this more upbeat and friendly, however, I need to address some things that have been going on in my life. These need to be said so I can hopefully feel better and move on.
I want to say sorry for all of this.
So basically what’s really going on is that since being stuck in quartine due to Covid-19 I have been getting more and more depressed and it had also starting to get worse with my seasonal depression. Losing my job, not having money to get by, not being able to help pay bills. Things really took a turn and I felt and still feel so overwhelmed by all of this.
I have also been affected by how empty my community is. Something that I have wanted to gain more attention to be more active and involved yet no matter what I do to update the community, share the community, do anything for the community I have created and want to be more there, it just stands still, or I’m the only doing anything. The only it feels alive is when I live stream that’s when people want to play and join. But it’s only then. I’m the only one doing anything to share the community to other forums to share things like such, I’m the only one to vote for it to boost it. You know it really drains someone who puts in so much effort into something they made and it gets nowhere. I just wish it was more involved.
I am sorry for things that I have done or said in the past few months to my community members and to friends and those around me. I’m not trying to be the bad guy, but I know I was an asshole. I am trying to reach out to better help such as a therapist. I really am trying to make this year count with myself and those who care about me.
If I upset you, scared you, worried you, or anything I am very sorry. I’m doing the best I can with the limited resources I can and funds I can to seek better help. I hope that I can make 2021 a better year for myself and those around me.
I hope that all of you who care have a wonderful 2021! Please stay safe.